I've been completely and utterly absent. In a lot of ways, too, not just physical. Mentally, for the most part. I haven't given a single serious thought lately as to how to move forward with my writing or any other creative project. At least, not in any sort of holistic manner. Sure I've thought about writing and thought about working in very tertiary ways. I've thought long and hard, as I always do, about how wonderful it would be to finally finish something soon, but I haven't grown past that in any meaningful way.
I've been in a slump. A dead slump. I blame a lot of things for this problem but most of them don't deserve the blame. Take for instance work. I hate work. I don't hate doing work, I don't mind getting up in the morning at those ridiculous hours it sometimes demands of me. I don't mind deal with the people and trying to spread my will among them like some movie-set dictator. I don't even mind the ego struggle. The only thing I mind is the fact that it draws me so far out of my regular routine. (Maybe "regular" should be in quotes, because its hard to call that regular when you are working more than half the year). When I'm working, I want to be writing and its all I can think about. I want to be applying me creative aspect to the word. I want to be etching my place in the human graffiti wall. But all I have the energy and time for is waking up, working 14 to 16 hours, and coming back home to sleep. There is the occasional weekend, and I'm grateful for them, but like anyone else in the business, I'm lucky if I have enough time to catch up on my sleep and do my laundry in the whole of those two days. Where the hell all those 48 hours go, I'd love to know.
At any rate, here I am again. At the beginning, supposedly, of another stretch of "me time". I'm off again. I have no prospective projects in the future. Or at least that's what I'm trying to tell myself. I know that there's something right around the corner and that more than likely I have about a full week before I'm scouting again. Bugger. But we must soldier on, mustn't we? At least its money and in the mean time, I have these few precious moments to myself where I can entertain the idea that I've broken past the need for real work, the money, the ladder-climbing, and have set down in an virgin world of fresh ideas waiting to be formed in the medium of my words.
Alright. That's the warm up for today. On to bigger and greater things now. Adios.
